Double Negative

Not never will I forget what it feels like to be alone
To be forgotten
To feel small
To be an option

Not never will I forget when I had nothing
Not a dollar
Not an eighth of gasoline
Not a bite to eat

Not never will I forget feeling unloved and unnatural
Feeling afraid
Seeing a 20 year marriage fail
And seeing what it does to the human heart

Not never will I forget the sound of death
And the whisper of promise of a new life
And the lesson of Gods plan and His “mysterious ways.”

Not never will I ever compare myself again
Because I know my resilience is unmatched
I know my strength is unparalleled

I am a wishing well of hope and I am open to pennies of prayers being planted in my optimism.

Never will I ever give up
Or sit down
Or back away
Deterrents are my comic relief

Not never will I forget I am a fighter
My flaws are grotesquely beautiful

My courage is my camouflage

Can I fail?
Yes
And I don’t care.
And I don’t care if you laugh
Or if you say you told me so
Or if you call me naive

Not never will I have not one regret. 

I am here
And with every intentional breath
My purpose grows

And you better never forget that.

By:Shaun Nickens

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