Photo by Fotoscapes.com

Song: Moving Forward by Israel Houghton

I’m tired of only posting pretty stuff. Today I laid out on the f******floor with a Spiderman blanket and a plain notebook. Things look so different from down there. I just literally laid my heavy heart down on the ground. Relief. Seeking warmth I just rolled up in the weight of my worry and listened to the heat come through the vents. If I curse am I a hypocrite? You taught me not to hold things in and to say them how I feel. I’m hearing gospel songs, “You make all things new.” You told me not to hold things in but I can’t just spill out all over the floor, the kids could slip. They don’t like tears, snot, spit and sadness in their food. So lately I’ve been holding tissues, paper towel or a t-shirt up to my face. Trying this new thing.

I call it the muffled scream wail-cry.

I kick my feet and try to force an internal combustion that no one sees. It turns into a weird growl. Then an inquisitive “why” as if I deserve to understand or question. You taught me how to spill out. She taught me how to pour in. Right now I just want to hold you and tell you it’ll be okay. Even if I’m not sure if it’s true.

Shaun Liriano 12/2/2020

When the booty calls back!

CLICK HERE FOR SOUND CLIP—–>>>>>>       Memo

When The Booty Calls Back

Its me…you remember don’t you?

Its 10:59 and I’m starting to despise time

So angry that its hard to keep the rhyme in these lines

I can feel my heart beating and vibrating my collar-bone

thumping to the tick tock of that chrome clock

26 hours ago, I was entering your room

24 hours ago It felt like you were entering my womb

Planting passion and paradise

I dreamt twice

I said goodbye to the man who was a day late and a dollar short

Now he’s scraping change and flipping his calendar back

I said goodbye…

I said goodbye! For you!

Are you ever gonna call?

I’m just another one hit wonder

And you’re taking my number off heavy rotation….

remember that Pandora lovemaking station we listened to?

Well its me…

…the one you called when you were lonely.

You remember, don’t you?

By: Shaun M Nickens